I used to think my spirit animal was a wolf. I'm fiercely loyal to my pack. Once you're in, you're in for life. Mess with my tribe and you're gonna get my razor sharp teeth in your hind quarters.
But lately I feel more like a mama bear coming out of hibernation.
A post-hibernation mama bear.
Is that a spirit animal?
I always see this poor sweet thing on the Discovery Channel and feel such a deep sense of empathy for her...
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Mama Bear is coming out of her cave, baby cubs crawling all over her like a jungle gym, She's been snuggling in her warm, dark, relatively quiet beds with her tiny cubs for months. She's enjoyed peace and tranquility within the walls of her soft, safe family cave.
Wasn't Advent, like, yesterday? Where's the Christmas tree? Why is there not a fire in the fireplace?
Where's my fuzzy blanket and my hot cocoa? Somebody sing "Silent Night" right now!!
And then... the birds start chirping. The cubs are growing restless. The cave feels less warm & snuggly and more hot and stinky. And the sun! Ugh! The sun is out so. Much.
The mama bear must face the truth. Her Long Winter's Nap is now over. It's time to -pause to brace one's bearself- go outside.
Don't the birds know that spring isn't officially here until March 20th?! It's like they don't have an iCal app on their phones at all. Ugh.
Spring. BLERG.
Mama Bear stumbles into the bright sunlight. "Ugh. I'm so fat! Why am I so fat?! AND hungry?! Darn you, nature and your cruel irony!" Her cubs sprawl and squeal all around her. "Annnnd they're hungry too. Awesome. I need a nap."
Seriously WHAT. THE. WHAT. I'm a house. I don't remember eating ALL THE FOOD IN THE WORLD. Why is this happening?!?! I need a snack.
Mama Bear tries to get her four legs under her and start the search for food, but has to simultaneously keep the babies from getting stuck in trees and falling off cliffs. And why oh WHY is the sun so bright?!
Time to exercise. In the actual outdoors. Go for a walk or something. But it's like I'm a newborn baby dear. I trip over nothing and look around to make sure that my neighbors didn't see. And as I'm looking around, protecting my dignity... I trip again. Am I a toddler??? What is the deal?!?! And walking WITH my little people... forget about it. They are seven blocks ahead of me and some stranger is looking at them and thinking "what kind of mother would let those poor children walk down this street all alone?" I'M RIGHT HERE, YOU JERK, I'M THE ONE FALLING OVER MY OWN SHOES BREATHING LIKE I'M IN A MARATHON, TRYING TO CATCH UP WITH HUMAN GAZELLES!!
I hate everything.
Eventually Mama Bear captures food (some other poor soul who left their hibernation that didn't want to) and the cubs are full and for a few brief minutes... their full bellies make them rest.
Ahhhhh... Nap time.
Mama rests. But not completely. She must continue her vigilance over her cubs. She keeps watch as she makes peace with the sun, the birds and the incessant noise of squirrels.
Now I'm sweaty, tired and I must sit down. But nope. It's 5:00. And I'm a mom.
Dinner. Why oh why does everyone demand dinner EVERY. SINGLE. DAY!
And hey, look at a calendar, you crazy animals and for the love of everything stop chirping and scampering all over my house at FREAKING FOUR THIRTY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT!!
Cubs are up. Joy. Mama wants to growl at the world. It's too cruel. Then the babies start frolicking and discovering. They play-fight with one another, they try to eat a flower, they attempt to chase squirrels ...and she remembers the joy. Her strength starts to return and the Long Winter's Nap is slowly melting away and blooming into the energy of Spring.
Breathe it in... Ahhhh. I have to admit, Spring smells so good. It makes me sneeze a little, but it's totally worth it. Hey! My forsythia bushes are blooming! And my yard is not a shade of "deep depression brown" anymore, it's kind of ... green! And oh yeah! Easter is coming!! Yay!
And BASEBALL!!! WOOT!!!
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So yeah, I think Mama Bear is my new spirit animal. Mixed with Salvador Perez. And a little newborn baby dear ... and some Michael Franti.
Oh, someone please draw this.
...but seriously, how did I get so fat?!?!
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